12 Mar Bullying at the work place
Hello Readers, please sit back , and visualize yourself as being this ant getting crashed by a gigantic pointing finger.
I bet your eyes will open suddenly as the sour memory will hit your mind as a lightning.
Your heart will pump faster and harder while a bitter taste of injustice will appear in the horizon. If this description awakens your senses, chances are high that you have acted by the last “F” of the three basic human reactions. You have been “frozen”! stunned by affirmation of your counterpart , let it be your friend or partner , peer or superior .
Argument is an essential part of our lives.
Seen as impolite, not proper, nor friendly by some people, considered as a threat to harmony in Asian cultures, perceived as an equivalent of confrontation; argument is the symbol of our difference of opinions.
Differences means diversity and it is an essential component of progress. If we would all look alike, talk alike and walk alike, as a society we’ll be so satisfied that we’ll settle in the comfortable cushion of fulfilment. Not that there is something wrong with being satisfied. But over the time we’ll cease to surpass what we are and what we do and how we think.
As a consequence we’ll become a huge full stop and our quest for evolution will end.
In my twenty five years of work experience, I came across to some people or culture of organisation that my mature age does not come to my rescue. A near death syndrome kicks in, my mind starts to wander out of the scene and wonder why people act the way they do.
What can trigger this need of bullying to be heard, and right at all cost? Why breathing becomes tense and discussion resembles to a fierce Ninja fight? While the strong opponent confirms naively to himself “ here you go I won again” the weak opponent struggles in placing a word in this myriad, majority of time leading literally to quitting the room with a bitter taste of “never again”.
I gave a lot of thought to this lately to find out finally that the loudest one is also the weakest one in the room.
The bully has a sense of fear and the only way to fight is to convince himself of being right.
Maybe if we cease to think that the best argument does not delve in being right or wrong but in achieving objectives, focus on progress rather than perfect solution. As a result both parties might end up to be partners rather than opponents in this journey of evolution.
Dare to argue, dare to share your opinion and never give up to engage for cultural or upbringing reasons.
As the saying goes “being polite in some situations is being unfair to myself”.
I would argue to being fair to everyone.